Your Handy Guide to All Things Tebow

Are you a sports fan? Me neither. But that’s okay because Gawker has published the Non-Sports Fan’s Guide to Tim Tebow, which should make those moments in the lunch room when you’re forced to interact with your coworkers while your Amy’s frozen entree heats up slightly less excruciating.

Who is Tim Tebow?

Tim Tebow is the starting quarterback (that’s the main guy who throws the ball) for the Denver Broncos and former quarterback of the University of Florida Gators, where he won a national championship and a Heisman trophy (college sports for “Oscar”). He was, before that, a home-schooled high-school football star, and was controversially allowed to choose the team he wanted to play for. Before that, he was a fetus. (His time as a fetus is important to an understanding of Tebow: more about it later.)

If he’s not very good, why does so much get written about him?

You live in this country, right? You are familiar with this country, and how much this country loves hard-working religious white people who defy the system and the wisdom of experts to do well despite bad odds. “Scrappy white guy uses grit, determination, and his faith in God to win miraculously under pressure” is what most people here think of as a good summary of the New Testament.

And if you need even more Tebowriffic content, here is Conan recreating Tebow’s game-winning pass against Pittsburgh using peanuts.

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2 Responses to Your Handy Guide to All Things Tebow

  1. I really dislike Gawker on principle, but I LOVED this. I generally fail to understand sports and football so I loved the extremely elementary aspects of this little FAQ.

  2. Pingback: Tim Tebow + David Bowie = Tebowie | Happy Valley News Hour

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