Can’t You Show Me Nothing But Surrender?

Given the amount of time Rick Santorum seems to spend thinking about gays and what they do with their tallywackers, you’d think he’d have a ready-made answer as to why gays shouldn’t be allowed to marry. I mean, his entire campaign is built upon the foundation that gays and their hot, hot ways are an existential threat to Western civ. But here’s Mr. Frothy getting owned on his signature issue, and by a student at a conservative Christian college no less.

Soon after the healthcare debate, recent Dordt graduate Jason Kornelis asked about a social issue of a different color.

“You talked about how this would be a hit to faith family and in America. What are some concrete things that you would say would happen if gay marriage was legalized?”

Santorum turned the question on him. And did so repeatedly.

“Can you contemplate any?”

“I beg your pardon?” Kornelis replied.

“Can you contemplate any?”

“I can’t think of–”

“You can’t think of a single thing?”

“A consequence..?”

“You can’t think of any consequence?”


“Really? Wow,” Santorum said, sounding bewildered. “Um okay, well let’s see if we can have a discussion … Let’s look at what’s going to be taught in our schools because now we have same sex couples being the same and their sexual activity being seen as equal and affirmed by society as heterosexual couples and their activity. So what’s going to be taught to our people in health class in our schools? What is going to be taught to our children about who in our stories, even to little children, what are married couples? What our families look like in America? So, you are going to have in our curriculum … a worldview that is fundamentally different than what is taught in schools today. Is that not a consequence of gay marriage?”

Kornelis responded, saying, “Whether gay marriage is legalized or not, there is still going to be gay couples. That is not going to change.”

“I’m not talking about–” Santorum started. “Well, what is going to be taught in our schools? In our public schools in our institutions?”

“I don’t think it is going to be that much different than what is being taught now,” said Kornelis.

“Really? I think you’re wrong. Okay, in fact you have to know you’re wrong because if we say legally is this type of relationship is licit and identical to other types of relationships than of course more of it will be taught because it is what the law says. Right now the law doesn’t recognize this type of activity.”

“Of course you will have to agree with me,” Santorum continued. “Right? I mean let’s be honest. You’re going to have to agree with me that that’s going to be a consequence.”

“I respectfully disagree,”Kornelis said, at which point Santorum thanked him for his question and for “engaging in an honest debate.”

So if gay marriage was legal then kids might learn that gay marriage was legal. And that would . . .

This entry was posted in Humor, Scathing Social Commentary. Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to Can’t You Show Me Nothing But Surrender?

  1. One wonders how he wields his own tallywacker in his own home but one tries not to picture it too much.
    “you will have to agree with me” How democratic of him.
    He’s a classic dick and that’s not the kind of dick anybody likes.

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